Sunday Re-Set and Refresh with Very.co.uk
As a teacher with late-diagnosed ADHD and autism, routines are very important for me. Without them, I get tense, and stressed, and if I’m completely honest, I tend to blow up the weekend with my feelings that get the better of me. I have to work hard to regulate my own emotions after a week of regulating the emotions of a class full of little people, and routine and consistency is the best way for me to end the week, and begin the new one.
We love working with Very.co.uk, and so we are delighted to be teaming up with them again to talk about how we get ready for the week ahead as a family. Very have been a part of our life for many years and we always find shopping with them so easy – for everything! So, this time, I’m sharing a few things that we do as a family that help to make weekends more enjoyable and the start of the next week that little bit less hectic – and they help me to feel as if I have had a weekend, and not just stopped working in school for two days.
Recently we moved to our forever home, and after 25 years of living in a two bedroomed home with three boys, our new one is quite something. It allows us all space, and peace…but it takes A LOT of tidying and cleaning. There are five bathrooms to clean which sounds amazing until you’re the one holding the toilet duck.
Friday
On Friday night, when we are all home, I make sure that all of the school laundry is collected. There’s a lot. Between the three of them, they seem able to squirrel away shirts, trousers, socks and pants in the most unlikely of places. Hero is the only one who seems to understand what a laundry basket is for [laundry], or what a kids storage unit is actually for [not hiding laundry] and so he’s easy. Hero also usually has his friend over to sleep for the night and the two teens are usually either asleep as the week has wiped them out [Jensen has ADHD and autism, and this is how he usually ends up after masking his days through school] or playing VR [Lyoto]. Lunchboxes are emptied after nagging for twenty minutes and after I’ve finished waking and cajoling everyone to get their homework done that evening instead of leaving it to fester over the two days off, which will undoubtedly lead to panic on Sunday evening, I’ll have a shower and settle down to watch something on TV with Gav because I know in the morning, my routine will begin.
Saturday
On Saturday morning, I start the weekend with a walk to the local shops, whatever the weather. This is my routine and the walk gives me time to think and process the week that’s gone by, and what I need to achieve over the weekend. The walk is only around 2 and a half miles there and back, and I visit Matt’s Bakery, to get the boys sausage rolls and fresh bread, I get some flowers if there are none in my garden at that time, and I visit the Mountbatten Charity shop. This weekend I got an “old lady” tea set, according to Lyoto. I was over the moon with my pink rose and peony set for just £20 and he will appreciate it when we have afternoon tea. Haha.
Bedtime Preparation
Before I leave though, I make the bed [on weekdays I usually throw back the covers and run for the dressing room] and I leave my book next to the bed, so that whatever happens during the day, I know at the end of it there’s a book I love and a cosy, uncrumpled bed waiting for me.
Whatever we do on a Saturday, I have to have achieved something. I cannot relax at all unless I feel as though I’ve earned it and I get antsy [which is a nice way of saying I can’t sit still at all and even if I do, my insides are in turmoil and screaming to me to get up and do something] and feel physically bad inside. I’ve learned this is because of my ADHD brain but that doesn’t change the feeling, just my awareness of it. Saturday night I’ll have a shower and prepare for Sunday, which is when I know things will be fine if I just follow the plan.
So late Saturday afternoon or evening, I set the breakfast table for Sunday morning. I use the table in the kitchen conservatory because it has the most light. I have collected what my husband calls “seasonal crockery” since I was 18 because I’ve always loved china and glassware and so I have quite a collection. I set the pine table with white tablecloths and water hyacinth place mats [because I like the smell], cut glass charity shop pieces and some flowers. I get out the pretty plates [this week it was Anthropologie aqua-pearl plates] that are normally off-limits and leave it until the morning.
Sunday
Breakfast
Sunday mornings from September to May are rugby days. We get up, get out and then come back for breakfast/brunch when we’re done training or playing. This week, Lyoto is off with an injury and Hero has the worst barking cough and cold and so we’ve had to abandon all hopes of playing. Breakfast was therefore served at a respectable hour and the boys enjoyed croissants, pains au chocolat, toast and fruit. It takes about 25 minutes to put together and then the boys arrive, all ruffled and in their pyjamas, and we talk.
There is something magical about being able to sit at the table with your family and marvel at how they’ve grown from little chubby toddlers to men with moustaches and biceps [except Hero, he’s still a teeny Beany] who can have civilised conversations with you. I say *can* because I’m sure it’s possible but most of our breakfasts are full with ridiculous nonsense. Haha.
Plants
After breakfast has been cleared away, there are a few things that help to make us feel as though we are ready for the week ahead. By this point the school clothes have been washed, dried and are in the wardrobes so that’s one less thing to think about. Now I focus on the house.
We have a lot of plants. Do not be fooled by the few in this picture. On Sundays we have a kind of plant clinic. I check the garden to see how things are going, and Hero takes care of the tiny plants that are growing. I like buying tiny ones so that I can feel like a real gardener when they grow huge. Once they’re all watered and checked for bugs or diseases, I feel like they’re set for the week ahead, too.
I take the two or three different bunches of flowers that I’ve got [the Co-Op does some nice ones, or our local Marks and Spencer Food Hall for around £3 a bunch] if there are none in my garden and I pop them in little vases around the house. Having them in my bathroom cheers me up in the morning. I either choose my wedding colours or something seasonal. They’re part of the reason I can wake up at 6am, clean my teeth and smile on a Monday morning before joining the M3 traffic extravaganza.
Chores
Chores are a big part of getting ready for the week ahead. Things are so much easier with a few things done that can make our lives easier. Towels and sheets make a huge difference. Everyone’s bed is changed, and towels are washed and dried and put into the towel cupboard ready for the week. There is no misery like reaching for a non-existent towel when you come out of the shower. I like big fluffy ones so that whatever the weather outside, I start dry and warm. The boys are hopeless at folding normal laundry but they can fold sheets and towels brilliantly. Lyoto is on hoovering whilst the biggest and smallest fold, fold, fold.
Clean Floors and Fresh Air
As well as hoovering, we’ve recently began steaming our kitchen and other tiled floors in the house because it feels so much fresher and feels like the grime of the old week has gone, and a fresh week is on its way.
Once it’s steamed, the floor is shiny and new, and I feel less germy than I did before. I hate shoes in the house but somehow as the boys get home before me, they stampede in without a care in the world and it gives me the icky. So, steaming feels really clean, not just tidy clean.
Jensen has decided this steam cleaner is his chore now though, and is trying to find other places to use the steamer. Note that in the picture, the steamer is not turned on because I hadn’t finished hoovering first, haha.
After the floors are steamed, I plug in my favourite air fresheners [at the moment it’s Honeycrisp Apple from Bath and Bodyworks in the kitchen] around the house and steam away. Wherever you are in our home, there is a different smell – and I’m not just talking about the socks. My brother and sister in law love our entry hall because it smells like Walt Disney World’s Main Street. It makes me smile whenever I walk through the door.
Something to Look Forward to
A big part of ADHD is dopamine chasing. I have to have things to look forward to. Not huge things like presents for myself or holidays [although that would be nice] but small things like a cup of tea or a homemade cookie [I sound food obsessed, I realise that].
I’m not saying I have to have something to look forward to every day, just that I feel happiest when there is a glimmer of light at the end of the weekend tunnel that will make me feel less awful about the prospect of Monday beginning all over again. When I was little, it was the Muppet Show and Howard’s Way whilst I was having my hair blow dried in a big rubber shower cap shaped thing….and now it’s dessert, or Poirot, or Miss Marple. Or Bridgerton.
Every Sunday we try and make a dessert that we can look forward to after dinner together. This week it was Eastleigh Mess. We call it that because we use double cream and not whipped cream and Gav says it looks much messier than anyone at Eton would tolerate. This week Jensen and Hero helped make it and we ate it watching Bridgerton and feeling fancy.
Spending Time Together
When they were little, it was easy to have time with them – but now they’re growing up, I feel like they need a purpose to spend time with me. Not because they wouldn’t want to, but because I don’t want to spend my time watching TV with them or for them to be scrolling through a phone, and I still want to be making memories. Food always brings people together. It doesn’t have to be fancy – like a quick biscuit recipe or an apple pie – just something everyone can be involved in and talk.
Hero kept asking how smashed was too smashed when it comes to meringues. We discovered that dust and chunks both taste as good.
So there we have it. Not everything that we do, but a few of the things we do to make things a little simpler for the week ahead and a little calmer in my head. I hope you have a restful and fulfilling weekend too.
